Oh, so I suppose this space is to tell you about me? You need only know three things: 1. I have an alterego at night that saves the day; 2. I have an alterego at the weekend that is a supervillain; 3. I have a professional alterego during the week; 4. I fear I may have multiple personality disorder; 5. I suck with numbers.
cis, she/her
Hey lads, I’m coming off of tumblr, it’s time. Much love to my friends and followers over the years, keep being your awesome selves and never give up on yourselves ❤
Seeing some people on Tumblr still bitching about how it’s too late for voting and the only thing that will fix things is revolution.
How about you fucking vote anyway? It’s not going to seriously cut into your “sitting on the couch waiting for a revolution to start” time.
There’s no “none of the above” option here. You want a revolution, fine, but there’s still little shit to do in the meantime.
You can vote AND protest. They’re not exclusive. Hell, you can even protest the person you voted for when they fuck up. You’re not signing a blood oath with your ballot. But a desire for an ideologically pure candidate or nothing only serves the status quo right now.
if you’re american and coming to australia, I’m gonna go ahead and say that you should be 100 percent way more worried about being king hit by a dude named “dane” in a bintang singlet than any fucking spiders that exist here
what does this say in english
“Good sir, if you are a resident of the United States of America and coming to visit the sunny land of Australia, allow me to inform you that you should be rather more concerned about being sucker punched by a gentleman named ‘Dane’ who is likely to be seen wearing a wifebeater with a beer company logo on it than by any of the dangerous spiders that exist on this lovely continent”.
ok so what does it say in american
“You’re more likely to get sucker punched/cold-cocked by an asshole than you are to be bitten by a spider”.
thank you
Well rattle my spoons, that don’t make a lick of sense. Wot in tarnation does this hootenanny say?
“If ya mosey on by Australia, you best be fixin’ to get to some fisticuffs more'n checkin fer spiders.”
Tony, a tired dad, trying his Best™ to train the youngerlings:okay, let’s try this one last time. Collapsing building, simultaneous alien attack. What do you do?
also consider: LOTR but hobbits have Tapeta Lucidum
Boromir gets the fright of his life their first night on the road
Boromir: *glances over his shoulder* ??!!!!???!!
Hobbits:
Hobbits: what
i will never get over that you used an image of raccoons for this purpose because it is incredibly accurate
LOTR au but instead of hobbits literally raccoons
Gandalf: well this raccoon found the ring and has been carrying it around. unfortunately we can’t take it off him or he gets very bite-y. so I figure, the raccoon is the ringbearer now
Elrond: what are those other three raccoons doing here
Gandalf: he brought his buddies. I call this one ‘Merry’
Aragorn: *watching Frodo & Sam scamper off in the direction of Mordor* our hopes lie with those raccoons now
Legolas: do they… know where they are going
Aragorn: I sure hope so
Faramir: father why is this raccoon in the livery of the citadel
Denethor: haha doesn’t he look precious
Elfhelm: Dernhelm, is that a raccoon in your bag?
Dernhelm: *sweating nervously* Uh no, sir.
Eowyn, later: And I said no, you know, like a liar.
Denethor: WHY did you let a raccoon go off with the Ring??
Faramir: ….it just seemed like the right thing to do
Gandalf: he scratched you up real good huh
Faramir: ……………gouged my FUCKING arm and bit me on my face
Witch King: no living man can kill me - AUGH FUCK, RACCOON, RACCOON ON MY LEG ARGHHHH
Eowyn: *stab*
Wraiths break into the room at the prancing pony: *UnHoLy ScReEcHiNg*
Trash Panda Hobbits:
Wraiths: Oh, what the fuck, whAT THE FUCK IS THAT?!
Treebeard: Baroom, humm, where are my small, impatient friends?
Merry and Pippin:
Don’t go where I can’t follow, Mr. Frodo.
~~~~~~The Hobbit interlude~~~~~~
Thorin:
You’re the burgular.Go on and…burgle something! Bilbo:
Saruman: Well since some fucking TREES took over Isengard I guess I’ll take over The Shire. Farmer Maggot and ever other Halfling down to the Sacksville-Bagginses:
Even funnier thing to imagine: resurrecting Diogenes too and telling him that “Platonic” relationships means not fucking, he’d probably laugh himself back to death.
So I actually know the origin of this term because it came up when I studied Plato in my classes. Basically, in ancient Greece it was a super common practice for teachers to fuck their students. Like all the time. It was considered a way for the student to “pay” the teacher. Plato thought this was bullshit. He felt that a student could not properly learn from someone who was truly only interested in having sex with them. He didn’t fuck his students and derided those who did. Other teachers who refused to fuck their students were said to have “platonic” teaching relationships with them – so named because they were following Plato’s example. So the reason it’s called a Platonic relationship is because Plato was heavily anti-teachers-fucking-their-students and it’s one of the few things he was ever even remotely correct about.
